Life will likely never be without problems , they are in fact part of daily life. What’s important is how and whether we face them.
Speaking at a buddhist meeting yesterday about the topic of facing our problems courageously I come up with the following from much reflection. I hope you can find it useful in your daily life when facing problems that arise. The most important thing is to face them head on. We can’t run away from problems or hide from them, they will only follow us.
‘Dont run away from your problems; face them! Because if you dont deal with your problems they will always be with you. Deal with a problem which arises; face it courageously.’ – Nelson Mandela
His advice is so true, as many of us may know. Never be afraid to face something; if you look within and have faith in a solution, you will always find the answer. There is a solution to every problem no matter how big or small, it is our minds that like to complicate things but there is nothing that can not be overcome and that does not have a higher meaning or purpose if we seek to gain this from it. It is from lifes difficulties that we can often learn and grow the most.
Trust in yourself – without this you will not feel able to overcome it , you may learn as you go along but if you trust yourself from the start you will know for sure that you can do it.
- Practice Compassion – Have compassion for yourself and others. Dont be too hard on yourself and have understanding for where you are currently at in your life. Also with others, by seeking to understand them we can let go of any anger that would only escalate a situation. If a person is trying to cause you suffering chances are that they are suffering deeply themselves. By seeking to have compassion for them you let go of any anger or resentment and also any causes which could cause further suffering for you or others involved. You cant change them but you can change your own response which can in turn make a big difference.
- Practice Faith – Whatever your faith may be, maintain your practice – Pray, Chant, Meditate and do this daily in your own routine. Having strong faith leads to strong determination, courage and inner peace. When you practice daily these qualities will be there to help you have the strength you need to overcome any problems.
- Be Honest and Open – If we are not honest with ourselves we are in denial which takes us back to facing our problems. We can not truly face anything until we are 100% truthful with ourselves and others, therefore the problem will keep coming back until we do. Repressing emotions also causes considerable physical stress which can lead to illness, so although it can be difficult facing problems now, it is actually the easier option.
- Give – Give to yourself and give to others, most importantly give time. Time is so important it can never be taken back it is also the thing we always remember, the times we have with people. When you are facing personal problems it can be easy to unintentionally forget others. However as Buddhism teaches, through helping others, our own problems become far smaller because we become part of something much bigger. We can realise that there are others who have similar or much worse problems than ours and that we have something to give them, that we can actually make a difference. We are all actually one big family; if we seek to help and not harm each other the worlds problems will become much smaller. We may think that as one person we can’t do much, but the causes you set can make differences that could go on forever. Never think you are too small to make a difference. As Dalai Lama IV said ‘If you think you are too small to make a difference try sleeping with a mosquito.’
- Patience – Cultivate patience within yourself, for yourself and others. Nothing big is usually solved or achieved overnight, things take time. Having faith in the right outcome helps with this. Have that inner knowing that all will be okay.
- Have strong determination – Through facing and overcoming problems determination is built , have absolute faith that you can do it and you can transform anything and you will.
- Take Action – Last and probably most important – if we dont take action nothing will happen, talk to that person you need to, take that call or whatever step it is you can take to begin facing the situation head on. Often things are not half as bad as we imagine them to be when we actually do take action and face them. If the challenge seems too big to face now then break it down in to small actionable steps that you can manage. Look to others who have overcome similar problems and know in your heart that if they can do it, then you can too.
Lastly to add and it may sound difficult to some, but always look inside for answers. Through our own causes we can create new effects and new situations, this is not about blame, but about empowerment. Through transforming yourself you can then transform your environment.
Who looks outside dreams; who looks inside awakens. ~ Carl Jung